Every 14th of February you get the chance to display your fondness for
your wife or girlfriend by showering her with gifts, flowers, dinner,
shows and any other baubles that women find romantic.
Secretly...guys feel left out. That's right...left out. There's no
special holiday for the ladies to show their appreciation for the men in
their life. Men as a whole are either too proud or just too embarrassed
to admit it. This is why a new holiday has been created.
March 20th is now officially 'Steak, Blow job & Shut the Fuck Up Day.'
Simple, effective and self-explanatory..this holiday has been created
so your ladies can have a day to show your man just how much you love
No cards, no flowers, no special nights on the town the name of the
holiday explains it all...just a steak, a BJ & shut your mouth for the
rest of the day! That's it!
This twin pairing of Valentine's Day and Steak, Blow job & Shut the Fuck
Up Day will usher in a new age of love as men everywhere will try THAT
much harder in February to ensure a more memorable March! It's like a
perpetual love machine.
The word is already spreading, but as with any new idea, it needs a
little push to start the ball rolling. So spread the word, and help
bring love and peace to this crazy world.
Oh, fuck off. Men have been using Valentine's Day as an excuse to get their steaks and bj's and the entire rest of the year is dedicated to shutting women the fuck up. I'm sure it goes way over my dad's head that sending me, his daughter, something like this is pretty *icky*. I'm glad I received this TODAY and not yesterday, seeing as though I did not get one valentine. My husband gifted me with the words Happy Valentine's Day and I got him a new candle and a little chocolate thing. Nothing much, just something from the dollar store. I got my son a Care Bear box with some chocolates, and I got his class little candy bracelets for him to give out. My son hand-made the cards for everyone in his class. He wrote "I [heart] You" for the girls, and "You Rock!" for the boys. Later on in the evening my son asked me "How come you didn't get any valentines?" Which was sweet of him to notice, I guess. My husband said that he was going to buy me something for $5, but then wondered if I was going to get mad that he didn't just give me the $5. Huh? I have to buy myself a valentine? I think that it was really laziness on his part because every other year he's gotten me a cute stuffed animal and I always enjoy that. He knows that, too. I don't prefer flowers that are going to die, I like getting live plants. I also happen to like stuffed animals. If I would have known he was flaking out on my thins year, I would have bought myself a plant. I still might. It's just not as fun as receiving it as a valentine. I don't care what it is, as long as it is not extravagant, I like getting something from my husband because at least he tried to be thoughtful (in the past). This Valentine's Day was a bummer because all the thinking he did was about me being mad at him for a lousy $5.
So, whatever. I'm gonna go buy myself a plant, and I'll like it. I'll like it much more than the retarded Valentine's Day email that my dumbass dad sent me.